So pretty sure I just got home from workish, and it's like four in the morning, and I'm friggin' tired, but more hungry, so I'm staying up, eating KD with no milk, because my parents are gross and our milk expired half way through last month. My contacts are coming out. Bed is very inviting. But I will update you fine people first.

      Ummm, health stuff. Ok, so I was in the ER again the other day, with another "panic attack." I had an ECG done which measures your heart rythmn I guess. It was normal apparently. So they gave me a couple more Adiven and sent me home. Went to my doctor's appointment on Friday (today) He said it was unlikely it was panic attacks, but sounded more like some sort of offest of Parkinson's disease (that was the best way he could describe it to me) It was some long name with rythmic tacacardia in it, which basically means my fucked up heart is getting diagnosed and fixed. Hopefully. Anyways that sounds pretty scary, but he said it affects young women, and it's nothing something I should be too worried about, and it can be controlled with proper meds. So I went and got another ECG done and I have another doctor's appointment on Friday to see if that's what it is. If not, then I guess we keep looking.

      Boy business. Apparently I am someone's "fifth." Yes, I was snooping, but with good intentions. Anyways, sounds kinda freaky to me. Is someone out there sleeping with me without my knowledge, or does this number system pertain to something else? Chris and I got back together on a whim for one day and then I called it off because I definately could not do it. Pretty obvious. I suck at the whole relationship thing anyways. So I'm single and happy being so, and seriously am not getting into a relationship anytime soon. That would be so fucked up.

      Friend stuff. Today while at work, I went to a party at Brendan's house. It was insane. Alyssa and Brendan were drunk, so of course, they ended up being all over each other, and Brendan's ex was there, and let's just say that she is definately not over him. So, me, being the only sober one there, was trying to be the voice of reason, but nope, everyone was definately too drunk to be anything short of retarded about the whole thing. And there ended up being a bitch fight, which actually made me laugh, and yeah, most of it pissed me off though, and reminded me why I stopped drinking.

      Janelle and I went to the river the other day looking for Chris and Josh. Long story short. I thought they had died. They didn't. Anyways, on the drive back, we saw THREE VULTURES. How friggin' cool is that? Seriously. I didn't even know there were vultures here. I think vultures, I think the desert. Anyways, so were chowing down on this very dead half of a dear, so I got out to, of course, check out said dear and vultures and millions of flies, and then the vultures started circling me, so I got scared and got back in the car. I thought that was fun.

      On a last note, I think. I'm sick of everyone trying to define themselves in the most ridiculous ways. "This is what I am, here is my label, (because it's a cool, trendy label) I fit into a nice little description based on the clothes I wear, and the music I listen to. Let's stop trying to define ourselves, and just concentrate on being who we already are. So many youth today are so busy trying to be so "unique," that everyone is just looking the same. Some girl came up to me the other day and said to my face, completely seriously, "Oh my god, you're so cute and punky!" Why? Because I have black hair? I was wearing my Domino's uniform. That's all it takes kids. If you hair is black, you're punk! Cool! Fuck off. My other peev right now is people fucking judging others before judging themselves. Next time you want to say something derogatory about someone, look at yourself and think about the time when you did (most likely) the exact same thing. Either empathsize with the person and have a decent conversation about it, or shut the hell up.

      Funny last thing. There's this gorgeous two bedroom basement suite in the house of a family that used to go to my parent's church. It's only three hundred a month. When I heard this and inquired to a friend of the families, I was told I wouldn't be accpeted there because I wasn't "godly enough." Seriously. Not even kidding. Anyways, so I'm sure you can now see where today's rants came from. I like tattoos. I want more. Bedtime.
music. i started a joke - wallflowers