Leave a comment with your name and I'll respond with...
1) something random about you.
2) a color that I associate with you.
3) a song that reminds me of you.
4) an animal you remind me of.
5) something I like about you.
6) a question I've always wanted to ask you.





     Name 21 people you can think of right off the top of your head.
Don't read the questions underneath until you write the names of all 21 people.

1. Chris
2. Josh
3. Janelle
4. Kayley
5. Bryce
6. Seve
7. Keegan
8. Ian
9. Alyssa
10. Candace
11. Scott
12. Frazer
13. Tristan
14. Jordan
15. Jordon
16. Peter
17. Laine
18. Loren
19. Erin
20. Alex
21. Ben

Q: How did you meet 14?
     I met Jordan when I went to see one of Chris' plays. Then I saw him again on kareoke night when he sang call and answer with geoff, who had dedicated the song to me. Not gonna lie, couldn't stop thinking about him after that, so I stalked him! And now he is on my MSN, which means I have succeeded!

Q: What would you have to do to see 10?
     Drive to camp, like I just did today, to say hello.

Q: What would you do if 20 and 9 dated?
     That would be pretty weird since they've never met and Alex loves Chelsea. Then again, Keith and Alyssa met through me and well... let's just not go there.

Q: Would 21 and 12 make a good couple?
     I was going to say no, but then I remembered that it was Peter who didn't like Ben. Er, no I don't think so. Ben loves Kori, and Frazer loves me, so no, it wouldn't work out.

Q: Describe 6:
     Seve works with me, and has gone through like three or four cars since I knew him. I made Monica hire him because I liked him and he made me laugh. He has dreadlocks and is pretty friggin' hot, but he's seventeen, so that's wrong.

Q: Do you think 19 is attractive?
     Erin? Are you kidding me. Erin has like perfect DNA. Seriously, he is the most beautiful human being I have ever seen. I told him that I liked him and wanted to have his babies, but I was very drunk, and he was very not into me. If I had the chance to produce offspring with him, I would, because he NEEDS to reproduce.

Q: Tell me something humiliating about 17:
     Ummm, once Laine kissed me, and I didn't kiss him back because I didn't want to go there with him. I guess that would be kind of embaressing.

Q: Do you know any of 4's family members?
     Oh, you know some of them. Like her mom, dad, cats, and extended family out to like her second cousins, twice removed. That's generally what happens when you're sisters.

Q: When's the last time you talked to 13?
     Hmmm, I talked to Tristan probably around a month ago on MSN or something. Maybe I commented on his myspace.

Q: What is 2's favorite band?
     Josh's favourite band is a three way tie between Slipknot, System of a Down, and Avenged Sevenfold. We were discussing that the other day in the car.

Q: Would you ever date 5?
     Bryce? I barely know him. He came driving with me while I was working the other day, and we are going bungy jumping soon, so who knows hahaha :)

Q: Is 11 single?
     Yeah, I'm pretty sure Scotty's single. At least that's what he told me when I told him I had a dream that we were dating.

Q: Would you ever want to be in a serious relationship with 16?
     I don't think that kind of a relationship would ever work out between me and Peter, even if I wanted it to. But I love Peter to death in a platonic way.

Q: Where does 15 live?
     Jordon lives in Nanaimo, on Neil rd, off of Ashlee rd. These are the kinds of things you know when you're a delivery driver.

Q: Are number 7 & 8 best friends?
     No, but Keegan and Ian work together, so at least they know each other, and they both have wicked senses of humor. Although, Ian doesn't fart on people, he just posts funny comics.

Q: Do you like 1?
     I love Chris very very very much. He is my best friend in the ennnnntire world and so much more. He is talented and creative, funny, smart, caring, kind, giving. He makes me really happy. He's a very special guy.

Q: Thoughts on 3?
     Janelle is wonderful, a very thoughful, caring, unselfish person. I don't see her much right now, but I'm kind of being a loner lately, and I think she understands that it's not that I don't want to see her or anything. You can tell Janelle anything. She's very kind and a great friend.

Q. Did you ever have a crush on 5?
     Hmmm, I think Bryce is cute, and I would definately like to get to know him better -- but as a friend only!

Q. Do you think 13 is attractive
     Tristan is hella-sexy. I had the biggest crush on him ever since we started talking, or whenver we met... which was in Tim Hortons. He was funny and made me laugh. That's pretty much the key to my heart. Make me laugh.

Q. What's 21's favorite colour?
     I'm not sure, although Ben does own a pink shirt. I would say black, even though it's not a color, that would still be his answer.

Q. What would you do if 19 just confessed they liked you?
     If Erin said he liked me, I would probably be very very surprised for several reasons, hesitate, say 'fuck it,' and then jump on him and start making out.

Q. What language does 20 speak?
     Alex speaks english annnd some German, but only what he knows from Rammstein songs!

Q. Who is 15 going out with?
     As far as I know, Jordon is not dating anyone, and seems to be perpetually single since I broke is heart many years ago. I'm just kidding. Jordon probably has a girlfriend because he's a cutie and a charmer. "Let's go in my room and watch porn, Tasha."

Q. Would you ever date 7?
     No, I really don't think so since one, he is going out with Keighly(sp?) who is very cute, and two, because he farted on me.

Q. Would you ever date 1?
     I dated Chris for four months, until we broke up in April I believe. I would definately love to date him again at some point in the future, but for the moment, I'm happy being single.

Q. Do you hate 21?
     Not at all. I dated Ben. Who haven't I dated, holy crap! He's awesome. We seem to understand each other on a special level, even though we don't talk very often. I know Ben always knows what I'm going through when I have a problem.

Q. What is 9's last name?
     Laukkanen.

Q. Would you ever want to be in a serious relationship with 2?
     Hahaha, wow, I dated Josh already and he's a really wonderful, nice guy. He's very thoughtful, always leaving flowers on my car and suprising me. If I wanted to be in a serious relationship, it would be hard to say no to him. He's very very sweet.

Q. What school does 3 go to?
     Janelle isn't currently going to school, but I think she was thinking about taking some sort of course at either Mal-U or Sprawt Shaw or something.

     I just realized that there's no question about number eighteen on here. I was going to make up a question, but no! That's how the game is played, biatches!
music. i'll let you live - taking back sunday





Two Names You Go By:
1. Tasha
2. Tash

Two Parts of Your Heritage:
1. Welsh
2. Irish

Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1. Black hoodie
2. Black boyshorts

Two Things You Would Want in a Relationship:
1. excitement
2. continuous contentment

Two of Your Favorite Hobbies:
1. Snowboarding
2. Listening to music whilst doing other things

Two Things You Want Really Badly At The Moment:
1. To not be sick
2. To be tucked into bed by somebody

Two pets you had/have:
1. Linkin, cat
2. Park, cat

Two people who will fill this out:
1. Janelle
2. Mmm, that's about it

Two things you did last night:
1. Worked until 3am
2. Slept until I got up to walk to work?

Two Favorite Places to eat:
1. I would like to eat Montana's. The entire building.
2. Pita Pit

Two People that live in your house:
1. Kayley
2. My parents (they're one being, right?)

Two things you ate today:
1. A bag of Sweedish berries
2. Yankee pot roast soup from Montana's

Two people you Last Talked To:
1. Chris
2. My Grandpa

Two Things You're doing tomorrow:
1. Working until midnight
2. Sleeping until I go to work

Two things you should be doin right now:
1. Sleeping
2. Sleeping harder





      So yesterday, Chris and I bought tickets for the late showing of The Davinci Code for us and Josh, thinking that would give Chris enough time to finish the book. Eventually the three of us were on my bed. Chris reading that book feverantly, me reading 'Into Thin Air,' and Josh sleeping slash snoring next to me. Quite the scenario. Anyways so we got to the movie, and everything the critics said was true. Tom Hanks was horrible. Sir Ian McKellen was the only good actor, there was a part where we all laughed. And the movie did NOT follow the book that closely. Things were added in, left out, and some things were just flat out changed. So yeah, quite a big let down. If you haven't read the prequel, 'Angels and Demons,' by Dan Brown, I would reccomend it because it's about ten times better than Davinci Code.

      Yes. And that's that. Latley I feel like I've been alienating my friends because I don't feel like going out or doing anything lately. They want to go clubbing and such, and I'm just really starting to see that that's not really my scene. Or everyone wants to get wasted and I'm not really into that either now. So I dunno. Maybe we'll be able to find some common ground or something. I've been avoiding so many phone calls because I think it will be worse to say, "no, i don't want to do that," everytime than to just not talk. I don't know. Things aren't really going like I planned them right now, so I'm kinda stuck and confused about where I'm going.
music. not enough - our lady peace





      The past two days have been pretty normal. Ish. Well, today I just sat around. I didn't get up until two because I was busy having a dream about Angelina Jolie. Definately too immersed in the pop culture. Definately a weird one. Kayley and I went to the mall, and I treated myself to a sweater and a noice khaki skirt, which I am currently wearing and slightly in love with. Since then I've been sitting on the comp, working away on my website, which looks lame. Well, the front page looks okay, but yes, more work needs to be done. I have fun hobbies. I took a break to watch 'The Elephant Man,' with my dad and Kayley. It was a frickin' good movie from 1980, with Anthony Hopkins. I would definately reccomend it. Chris stopped by before work, and we had clam chowder for dindins. That about sums up today.

      Erm, yesterday Josh woke me up at the unholy hour of eleven thirty in the morning so that we could pick up Loren and go to the pocketbike races, which were at Cyber City and were really boring. Especially since we missed the one guy that actually bailed. Then the three of us went to Parksville to play mini-golf. I won, beating Josh by three strokes. Then I bought us ice-cream which was sooo good because it was in a waffle cone which I have been craving for quite some time.

      When we got back to Nanaimo, I got dropped off at Chris', so that I could use his car for work. So, funny things that happened while working. This lady tried to pull ahead of me when she was in the merge lane, and ended up driving next to me on one lane, so I got mad, did NOT back off, and forced her off the road. It was a triumpant victory for me. Then some guy's tailgate flew off his truck, went spinning in front of me, and landed at the side of the road, that was kind of scary. I got off at nine as expected, got Pita Pit, and went to the fireworks with Chris and Josh. I had cotton candy, watched some little kids fight, and had many an adventure. Tomorrow is another day off... and I will probably just be lazy again. MY GRANDPARENTS ARE COMING UP THIS WEEKEND! Woohoooo!
music. some string version of the titanic theme song





      Well, now that it is two in the morning, which I just realized. I think I will be heading off to bed soon. Does everyone like the new template? Because it's the reason I'm still up. I've been working on it since... I got home from work... which was probably around eight this evening. Ah, I'm such a geek, I'm totally gonna have carpal tunnel. My neck is killing me. So no more stressing out. Days are fine/good. I went for a run after my last post and watched some funny movies, so I felt better. Josh and I are going to watch the pocketbike races at Cyber City tomorrow.

      Annnd after that I have to work at five. I'm supposed to be closing, but I told my boss that my family wanted to have my birthday dinner and that I need to be off at nine. So at nine... I will be heading down to the waterfront to watch the fireworks! Ah, what an ingenious plan! So yes, hope to see everyone down there. Annnnd yeah, not much to say. Ian added me on MSN so I am happy. We talked about dinosaurs and doing dinosaurs, and I don't remember how that happened, but I made him a funny picture because I am awesome. It was Tristan's and my cousin Megan's birthday two hours ago, so happy birthday to you! I have nobody to talk to on MSN, Jordan, where are you, you said you were going to stay up!
music. they're only chasing safety - underoath





      FUCK. FUCK. The old blogging when you are so fucking pissed off that you can't see straight. Fucking technology. I'm going to be straight up with this and it's all going to be complaining because this is my blog and you don't have to fucking read it and I can say whatever the fuck I want. So if I want to bitch, then I will. What the fuck did I do to start this horrible chain of events. God hates me. Or something.

      Here Tasha, have a nice pile of: car breaking down, YOUR ONLY SOURCE OF MONEY RIGHT NOW BECAUSE YOU NEED IT TO DO YOUR FUCKING JOB, every single fucking week. Your boss is a huge bitch, some fucking asshole hates you and fucking gets in my FUCKING BUSINESS, all the fucking while, complaining that people won't stay out of his damn business. Get fucked you piece of shit. Your mother hates you and tells you you're annoying because she's a fucking bitch. By the way, you're just like her, did I mention that Tash? Nobody fucking remembers my birthday party even after I fucking send out a damn invitation to fucking damn near everyone I fucking know. Which by the way ends up being one the worst 'parties' I've ever had. Oh, and barely any friends show up.

      Here is this piece of shit for you. I found it in the garbage. I hope you like it. You don't like chinese, right? Oh you do, that's new? Oh, it's not? Oh well, I always get you and Kayley mixed up. *GLARE* You're gonna get kicked out of your house because your mother thinks you're ugly and she's God, so no tattoos or piercings because they make you UGLY. People you looked up to have blocked you on MSN for no reason, you fucking bitch. Fuck you and your self richeous attitute. I'm a bitch but at least I'll tell you to your fucking face. Oh, and the rest of your life hinging on getting into school? Well, don't you worry. You only have to save up money for it while you're trying to get your car repaired so that you can CONTINUE to make said money. Oh all your courses are already full. Sorry. Guess you'll have to live here longer with someone who thinks a fucking giraffe is better than HELPING ME GET ON WITH THE REST OF MY FUCKING LIFE SO I CAN GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE AND LEAVE ALL THIS FUCKING SHIT BEHIND.





      Mhm, mhm, okay. So the sun is pretty much rockin. Tuesday or whenever was so hot, it was sooo nice. Today is my second day off this week. Chris and I went to get his car fixed this morning and we ate McDonalds. Annnd, then we were lazy, and I went to Janelle's and swam in the pool and suntanned, and now I am all sticky and such. I have short little arm hairs starting to grow out of my tattoo again. They look funny. Also, I want to get my next tattoo... soon, like next month. Polaris lyrics. Jimmy Eat World, anyone? 'they say that love goes anywhere, in your darkest time, it's just enough to know it's there.' But I dunno how I wanna do that, so any suggestions, send 'em over.

      In other news, let's recap. My party went ahead as planned after I bribed my parents with one hundred dollars. Ah, the things I resort to. Anyways, thanks to everyone who came, and thank you to Chris and Josh for making me a wonderful Lunchables Pizza Cake. It was the best thing ever. Also, they got me my Tasha Place sign, which I have to figure out how to get the bolts off of. Ok, other than that, my party totally sucked. A few of my close friends came by, but everyone else (most of the people there) were friends of friends, aquaintances, or people I didn't know at all. It kinda sucked. Then there was some shit going down with some people wanting to beat up some other people and blah blah blah. Some ex-boyfriend of a friend showing up, my best friend leaving, me leaving. Yeah, it was pretty bad. When Seve finally got there, he had to drive people home, and then the party was pretty much over anyways. Josh was like falling over drunk. He almost fell down the stairs, and he fell into my shelf and gashed his face open and told Candace that I had slammed the door in his face. Yeah. Then Janelle, Frazer, and I crashed on my bed, and I was stressed out, and I couldn't breathe, and I was the only sober one all night.

      Ok, so you get the point. I didn't enjoy myself, and I don't think I'll ever be having a birthday party again, since none of my friends can be bothered to come. Bitter much? I'm over it. So anyways, that had been me hoping that my month would get better and it didn't and it has continued to stay that way. My car overheated again, and I guess the hole in the waterpump is back. I don't have the money to fix it right now cause I called ICBC and my insurance actually does cover that accident I got in, so I just have to pay back ICBC the twelve hundred, so that my insurance rate doesn't go up... again. That was fun. So yet again, I am car-less, and I drive for a living.

      Chris and I are planning our roadtrip to Medicine Hat soon. We're going in July, and we're going to make stops at you know, the important places, such as the Enchanted Forrest, West Ed Mall, etc. Truly beautiful places... Yep. I was supposed to go down to Pinnacle today to get a membership so I can get pumped up for school... but no car makes that a problem. Chris and I were gonna go down to Tranceformations and talk to Dave about our upcoming tattoo plans, but Chris has failed in the call-me-back department. Maybe I'll go for a run later, I'm not sure, I'd like to do it somewhere pretty though, no along the highway.

      In closing, I decided that I will probably take my paramedic course in Parksville instead of moving to New West, so that it will be cheaper, maybe I can finally move out, and so that I'll have a better chance of getting hired into Nanaimo when I grad. But yeah, there are no full time courses again this year it seems, so I don't know what to do... I was thinking Kelowna cause I want to live there so bad, but I have no idea who I would stay with for the four months. In other news, Alyssa is going to do the program too, but probably not with me since she can't get her class four for another month, and I get mine next month! Yayyy, finally, I have been waiting a year for this. Much love.

      Oh yes, and one more thing I forgot. My parents got home this afternoon from Vancouver and we were supposed to celebrate my birthday. Now, I'm not reallllly a materialistic person, whatever. Okay, so for my birthday, I was hoping I would get something useful, like say, some help with fixing my car. My mother picked me up this little giraffe? ornament from somewhere... I don't know what to do with it. I wish my parents knew me better. They would never get Kayley something useless because they know she doesn't have anything to do with it and will just get rid of it... which I will probably end up doing with this giraffe? shortly. So yeah, it's not that I'm like, it's not good enough. It's just why do they not make any effort to know me. Oh Tasha, we didn't get you any dinner because we know how much you hate chinese. What are you talking about? I love chinese... FUCK. My grandparents know me better than that. They get home this weekend. Thank God. Fireworks this Sunday, anyone?
music. behind me, another fallen soldier lies - as i lay dying





      The demand for more entries has been met. Sort of. I feel special. Okay, updatey. This has been a pretty bad last couple of weeks for me, with some good stuff in between to make sure I don't go crazy. It all started with the car trouble. I already knew I needed a new clutch, but when I was delivering, I hit these massive above ground manhole covers and scraped my muffler loose. Man, was it loud. Was I upset? Yes. But this was only the beginning. Fortunately, Josh was with me, and he said he would be able to fix it. However, when Chris tried to fix it the next day, I don't remember why, but it wouldn't work. So we took it to Speedy, where the guy said it was gonna cost like $450 because it couldn't be reattached, it needed to be replaced. I started crying, hahaha. Long story short, we bought a part at Lordco, went to Promax, and found out that some idiot had welded the entire muffler together, so it took a lot longer than expected, aka, more money. In the end through, it ended up costing like $250. Then came the bad news. I had a hole in my warer pump, (I feel like I'm telling you guys how I found out I had cancer or something) and it was going to cost like $650 to replace. Fuck. So, more crying on Chris' shoulder.

      I couldn't afford to do that right now, so I was gonna have to just top it up with water every day until I could get it fixed. Few days go by, no problemo. Then, when I am delivering pizza, I remember why I hate my blue tinted windows, and I back into a car, leaving a nice scuff mark and a small dent. I talk to the guy, who is pretty nice about it, and he says he'll call ICBC (which is bad, because I don't have delivery insurance) and get a quote etc. He gets back to me a couple days later while I am shopping and says that it's going to be $1200 to fix! I start crying. (Lots of that going on, apparently) So I didn't think it should be that much, so Chris and I snuck over to his house around three one night and checked it out with camera and flashlights in hand. We were very stealth. Chris thinks it's less than $1200, but I haven't talked to the guy in a while, so, whatever, that's still up in the air.

      A few days go by, Chris gets annoyed with me and calls me a crybaby. I start crying. Then he later apologizes, when he realizes I am having the worst time ever right now. Um, a few more days, then all of the sudden, my car is overheating like nuts. Kinda suprised my engine didn't seize. So no more driving. Took four days off work, finally decided to try that Bar Leaks stuff, even though the hole was in my water pump. Lots of manhours later and it seems to have worked. So for now, the blue beast is running. Sometime during this period, my mother has agreed to let me having my birthday party at my house, and that she and my dad will go to Victoria for the weekend. I am ecstatic because it had been looking like it wasn't going to happen. Foreshadowing.

      This morning, I woke up at three pm because I had stayed up all night reading Angels and Demons by Dan Brown. (read read read!) As soon as I walk upstairs, my mother, the drama queen, says, "I'm not so sure about this party." I'm not so sure what she means. That's nice? Blah blah blah, if anybody dies, it's our fault. Fuck. I had a massive party last year and nothing went wrong. Seriously, my mother is grahhh, there's not even a word for it. She starts shouting to my dad to join forces with her, but he stays silent. She announces that her and my dad will go out for the evening, and will be back at 11pm. Two hours after my party has started. Before my party has even started. I scream and yell, and tell her I'm not having her ruin my party. She's goes back on several promises. I leave for work and cry in the car. I am furious. I throw things.

      Yesterday was a bad night at work. A customer asked Monica if I was a crackhead, told me I was an idiot, and yelled at me for being so. Some guy had been waiting outside his house, which I was delivering too, and they payed me for the pizza. Happens all the time. Cept this time, they were the wrong people. Great. And then Monica sends me to fucking the end of Cedar and gets mad when I am gone too long. She cries. I cry. Seve brings me Cotton Candy. I feel like throwing up.

      Highlights lately are... (was) the upcoming 20th birthday party, seeing Jordan outside the queens teehee... that's about it, I ate lots of MGM, but I'm pretty sure I got food poisoning, since I've been waking up really sick lately. Uh yeah. So I'm hoping against hope now that I can convince my dad to just let me do this party. If not, then I guess I'll be sending out an e-mail about it later. I'm getting really upset and angry. Perhaps I will go cry. Or maybe eat. Eating makes me feel better. (I'm a fat kid at heart) Hope that wasn't too boring.
music. new hawthorne heights cd





      I've come to the conclusion that you've got to be lying to yourself. You say you still care about me, or "like me a lot," but everytime we're together, you don't seem to be happy to be there and you say things that hurt me a lot, and that it doesn't seem that you put that much thought into it before it comes out of your mouth. I think subconsciencly you're realizing that you don't love me anymore, but you're not ready to deal with it. That would explain why you're not happy being around me, and why all these problems are coming up now. I don't even know what else to say, but I'm upset that this is probably the reason. So look inside, and quit lying to yourself and to me, and just admit that you're done with it.
music. mezmerize cd - system of a down