I am confused and unhappy and just... does this ever end? You were a complete joke that really had me going, you have to pretend you don't love me anymore and try to throw your "accomplishments" in my face, and you, you I am just utterly confused about, and I don't even know why. Those were all different people... by the way.

      What kind of image do I put out? This horribly sexual one most likely. Unfortunately... is that really how I am... or what I want people to think about me. I dunno. Who I am on the inside doesn't always show. Or maybe it does cause I am conflicted so I guess half of me shows. And I don't know what I want, and so I am confused. And I may as well have. Just. I can't even talk about this.

      I don't think Keith like... even wants to hang out anymore. He doesn't really talk to me, or... seem to want to see me. Jordon's leaving for Tofino soon for a few months to work. I don't see you, and you just fuck me around, where the hell do you get off acting like that and having pictures and letters from me right next to your fucking bed. Why am I so upset.
something i can never have - nin