Ok things just keep getting worse. Apparently Nathan isn't even going to show up at the meet now. Why is he avoiding me? This is so pointless. We're never gonna figure anything out the way this is going. I mean, I want to see him so much! Like it's not like your feelings can change in one day after ten months. It's just too hard. No matter what happens, I still want to see him. Man, this bites. I never meant for things to happen like this. Nothing is going right. What the heck, is he actually mad at ME or something? He keeps asking me what's wrong. Well, N, maybe the fact that you just told me you aren't a christian might have something to do with it. Life sucks right now. Two days before we see each other after two months.